Dear YM.com,
I have been dating my boyfriend for about a year and a half. Things were really great up until about two months ago when we first started fighting. It all started because of a jealousy issue; I'd hung with my best guy friend, and my boyfriend got mad.
Now, I don't know what to do. I am stressed out all the time, and it just feels like I'm not happy anymore. I'll admit that at times I feel complete with him. However, the majority of the time, I don't. Yet, it's so hard to walk away, especially when we've been in a relationship for so long. Should I stay with my boyfriend or just move on?
Rose, 17, Mission Viejo, CA
It sounds like you already know the answer, Rose, at least that's what is coming across in your e-mail. If the majority of the time you aren't happy in a relationship, and it's causing you a lot of stress, that's a serious tip-off that it's time to break up. You will still have special memories of the good times, and there's a chance (albeit a slim one) that you two will be able to be friends after the breakup. Staying together just because the two of you have been in a relationship for a while is not a good enough reason to stick it out, particularly when you feel bad about where you're at.
Have you clearly told your guy that his behavior is causing you pain and making you pull away? It's possible that he doesn't fully understand, although we are going to assume that you've already talked to him and that it hasn't helped much. If there is part of you that wants to make it work, it may be worth it to explain that his jealously is driving you away, and that if he can't trust you and stop fighting, then you will end things, immediately. But it sounds to us like you're already at the breaking point, so the best thing for you would be to kindly tell him that it's over.
Andrea Pyros
Are your friends sick of your guy problems? We're not! Write to Heart to Heart via e-mail. Please include your first name, age, birthday, city, and
state. YM.com cannot reply individually to questions.
All Letters become the property of ym.com and may be reused in any other media.
|